Friday, 17 December 2010

It gets better... right?

I don't like 3D. Not a good start for someone on this course and it's making me a little nervous. I SHOULD be throwing myself into it and yet I just aren't. I hate it, it's so monotonous.
Extrude, click, extrude, click, bevel, click, target weld, target weld, target weld, cut, cut, cut, cut... strangely the unwrapping part is somewhat therapeutic and I can get through it rather solemnly.

In the spirit of being honest and blunt: I took 3D because I had to. Due to the odds of me getting a job as a 2D artist are slim to none, even with the addition of 3D are they still slight. Still, it's something.
I so badly want to be a character artist, a vehicle artist – shit even a landscape artist would make me happy. I want to draw, I want to learn how to use watercolours properly and I want to understand Photoshop and get used to drawing with a tablet. I want that dual-monitor setup that so many artists have, I want a room filled with books containing all manner of references. I want to look at a game and say:
'See that? I designed that.' Yet now I'm looking at it and just seems to be: 'See that? I designed that... and spent a few days of my life getting fucking frustrated with it trying to model it into 3D. Why can't someone else get paid for this shit? I'm the imagination, they can do the boring part.'

I do 2D because I love it. I do 3D out of necessity. Maybe it's too early for me to be hating this as it's probably just the initial frustration of learning something from scratch – god I hope so. I refuse to fail this course, fucking out right. It's a matter of self-respect that I finish this course.

This is a complete whine post and I just need to get it out there. With any luck, I'll look back next year and see this as a nothing more than temporary bout of fuck-wittery.

I trust my honesty in posting this doesn't affect my presence here; just something I wanted to get off my chest.

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